So you’re ready to shoot your shot with the person you keep internet stalking on the low, but you’re not really sure how to do it or what to say. Social media has become one of the number one ways that society stays connected with the people and things going on around them. With that being said, I am not against people who look for potential friends or partners online. In 2018, it’s honestly a very normal thing to do! I know it might feel strange to find yourself feeling someone you’ve only seen online, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still shoot your shot. If your mind is telling you to slide in the DMs, do it. You just have to do it the right way. Whether you feel like a professional when it comes to starting a conversation online or you need some serious guidance on how to do so, these tips will make you feel a lot more prepared to shoot your shot with your #MCM or your #WCW! Let’s get into it!
- Say the right kind of hello. It’s all about making a good first impression. From the minute you hit that ‘send message’ button, you’ve got to come correct. You can really mess up what could have been simply because you jumped into someone’s inbox with pet names and foolishness before you even knew who they were. When I slide in the DMs, I usually lead with playful humor or a compliment. Nevertheless, when in doubt a simple “Hi, how are you?” will do in most cases. I think the other thing to take into consideration when choosing the right greeting is whether or not you know the person you’re messaging. If you don’t know them, always go with a normal greeting. Compliments are nice, but coming from a stranger it can be a little weird if done incorrectly.
- Do a little research. Yes, I think it’s important to do a little ‘research’ on the person you’re about to message. Especially if you’re introducing yourself online to someone you do not know personally. No, I’m not telling you to go 52 weeks into their Instagram feed, but read their bio and maybe even take a good look a few of their most recent status updates and posts so that you can get a feel for what to say to them and how to say it. Doing so could also pave the way for you to appropriately find something to compliment them on. Most people have their general information along with the things they are proud of in their bio and on statuses, so this is another way to open a conversation when you slide into the DMs.
- If they are in a relationship, don’t ask to be their friend. This may sound a bit harsh, but when someone is in a visible relationship and you slide in the DMs, very few people will find that respectable. I will say that the only exception to this is when you’re contacting someone through DMs about business. If you notice that your internet crush is in a relationship, you’re just gonna have to wait your turn because asking if they want to be friends definitely paints the wrong picture.
- Have a fruitful conversation to offer. When you do a little research it should give you good insight on appropriate conversation starters. Most people don’t choose to be a mystery on social media. If you look into their profile just a little bit or you’re familiar with the things that strike their interest as a result of following them, it shouldn’t be hard to have a fruitful conversation with them about things that both of you are interested in. You want to be sure to have something to offer when you slide in the DMs because nine times out of ten, you’re not the only one. So, don’t just say hello and then expect them to be interested in starting a conversation with you solely off that. Be memorable. Don’t be inappropriate and most importantly, don’t be rude, insulting, or discouraged if they reject your message. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
- Don’t ask them for their number, offer yours. After a few successful conversations with your virtual crush, the two of you may decide to continue speaking to one another. If and when this happens, do not ask for their number. You are the one that initiated the conversation, so you need to be the one to follow it all the way through. Kindly let them know that you’ve enjoyed the conversations had and that if they would like to they can connect with you via phone call or text. That is much more appropriate than asking them for their number. It also gives them the refreshing option of contacting you at their earliest convenience, instead of them feeling vulnerable about your ability to contact them at your free will.
Don’t underestimate the power of conversation because if you slide in the DMs the right way, the results can truly be rewarding! People are flattered by intellect and confidence. Start a valuable conversation and watch how the friendship escalates!